My Laptop can fix global warming and make people cul

So I bought a new laptop like two months ago. It's a MacBook Pro - you know the totally awesome one that people are jealous of and can't afford and is pure silver and can construct space shuttle Apollo 756 (I don't know which one we're on at the moment, but none of the Apollos went to the sun, or even planned on going to the sun so why didn't they call it Lunar unless the Russians beat them to that name. Damn), yes I have that laptop that can make star ships and death stars at the touch of a button and make Bob Saget keep quiet.

I know right. Jealous.

That one. It's mine. I can't really afford it either, but by the time the government figures it out I will be in Russia making Lunar space shuttle 21, only because I have all the equipment now and because I drew the French flag wrong and now they won't let me in there. But if I'm Russian I can go to France because of the cold, I think.

So the really expensive laptop that I bought that can create weather patterns and change the currents in the ocean, didn't come with a bag. Like, couldn't they just have skimped on that last coat of pure silver and thrown in a bag and perhaps a cool badge that says "I have a really expensive laptop that can give people superpowers and fix global warming" so that everyone would know even when I wasn't carrying the laptop in the bag that they never gave me, that I have a really cul laptop and am better than them because of it, so that I can skip queues in the cinema line and get free tickets at amusement parks and if anyone starts complaining I shout "Get back!" and point to the badge and then they totally back off.

That's what they should've done.

But no. I have to go and buy one (for like a whole other amount I can't really afford). So I buy this one:

It's a Targus hard case slim line fusion executive notebook case (which I don't really understand) and is 15.4" big. My computer is 15" big. So now I have 0.4" of room for my really expensive laptop to move around in, against the hard case, which is really great because now I have to fill those 0.4" with stuff so that it doesn't move.

So I was thinking I could use the space for:

A mosaic mural



Transport some extra spark plugs.

OR


Carry miniature Pepsi bottles in wooden crates for a dollhouse.

And the culest thing about my new bag that didn't come with the really expensive laptop that can see into the future and elect the next president of the United States, is that it has a lifetime warranty. So if it breaks they will replace it or fix it or whatever, without me paying - 'cept the strap and zip. Those aren't under warranty, and in my head I'm going "oh good, because those never break".

That's cul.

PS I can't do PSes because I don't have anything else to say.