They put aspirin in the chicken and spinach dish.

The other evening I went to this place that makes like amazing pasta. I think it's amazing because the next day heated up it's not so great with the cream going all orange from the oily-ness/oiliness. I rocked up with Tim the giant headache. We won't go into the reasons as to why Tim came about, but suffice to say I had the best weekend ever.

So before I let anyone order, I shout at the food-servant drone to fetch me some pain killer (I don't know why I have any friends). He says he'll check if they have.

He comes back and goes: Yes. We do have.

me: Excellent.

Food-servant drone: *nothing*

me: Where is it that you have it?

Food-servant drone: *picks up menu and pages through it*

me: *OMG! Not only do you have them on the menu but you have a selection and want me to choose! I love this place*

Food-servant drone: There! *pointing to a delicious chicken and spinach treat*

It's at this point that I begin to think that he doesn't know what I'm talking about when I say pain killer. So Tim and I look up at him and go: Pain killer. The little tablet-like thing that kills my pain. The pain in my head is paining me. End the pain food-servant drone!

Then he's like "Oh pain killer" and I'm thinking "yes. But it does sound a lot like Pasta con pollo".

So he runs off. By now no one has been allowed to order and these people are still my friends. Relatively.

He comes back with a glass of water and a folded piece of paper with powdered pain-killer inside. Yip. It's none other than Grandpa! I hate powder pain-killers mostly because I end up doing it wrong like pouring it all over my face or under my tongue where I taste it and can't get it out quick enough because it forms this like cement paste forcing me to do the dog-eating-peanut-butter trick with my mouth while everyone watches me.

So again, I fear tasting the horrible powder and quickly throw all of it in the paper thing (which my friend rolled all to well) onto my tongue. But in my haste to digest it as quickly as possible I swallow before I finish pouring sending half the powder up my nose. Not through my nostrils but the back of my nose through my sinuses.

Now everyone is watching me and Tim and I have to look composed but the powder stuff reacts with my sinuses like bicarb and vinegar and my eyes start watering. I throw back the glass of water (still in my haste) and start choking on that sending the spluttering water molecules out through the front of my nose.

The taste of the powder mixing with the water forming the cement paste coming out my nose was quite unpleasant so I react like in Aliens when the thing comes out of them when they're pregnant with the aliens. Like that and like in the exorcist where the person is all battling with the demon inside them. So I'm flailing around the table battling the internal powder demon only to look up from my powdery haze and see that I have successfully managed to draw attention from everyone in the resaurant.

I quickly stop and compose myself and sit quietly while the friend next to me points out that I still have paste on my face. But Tim left. I think mostly because I scared him away.

This whole oredeal lasted like 20 minutes. I hate taking pills.

PS Ok, it's not really a pill. If it was a pill I would just do the pill-stuck-in-my-throat trick which is nothing like the cement-powder-paste-in-my-sinuses trick.

PSS I ended up ordering the chicken and spinach thing. It was quite delicious. But I was sick from the nose cement so I didn't eat a lot. Blah.